These were *not* the Xmas Eve visitors Lorenzo was expecting. Now he's just ~along for the ride~.
BuzzFeed Dude A Day
Dump it in.

It was a cold, snowy winter’s night. Lorenzo hung his stocking by the fireplace. He shivered as he was shirtless, wearing only plaid boxer shorts. Thank god he’d just made a mug of steamy, creamy, chocolatey hot cocoa to warm things up. He grabbed a fresh bag of mini marshmallows. Lorenzo LOVED marshmallows.

He aggressively ripped open the bag and it exploded. A waterfall of puffy little marshmallows cascaded over his chest. They went everywhere: into his cocoa, all over the couch, down his boxers. As he picked marshmallows off his body, eating some, putting some back in the bag, he was startled to hear a knock at the door. It was late.

Lorenzo opened the door to find an eerie, glowing figure.

“I like those boxer shorts,” said the creature.

“Who are you?”

“I am the Ghost of Hot Dudes Past.”

Suddenly Lorenzo and the ghost were transported to another time and place. It was Lorenzo’s childhood kitchen. Lorenzo saw himself as a child, pouring way too many marshmallows into his cocoa, ignoring everyone else in the room. He used all the marshmallows and there were none left for anyone else.

“No more!” Lorenzo cried. And suddenly the ghost was gone and he was back in his apartment. He stared at the pile of marshmallows on the couch. But he heard a noise coming from the kitchen. He walked in and discovered a portly gentleman sitting on a throne made of jumbo marshmallows.

“Look upon me!” said the Spirit. “I am the Ghost of Hot Dudes Present. And those are some nice boxer shorts."

Lorenzo looked around and realized he was no longer in his own apartment. He was at his hot friend Carl’s apartment. Carl was shirtless, wearing only boxer briefs and enjoying a mug of cocoa. But something was missing. There were no marshmallows in the cocoa. And yet, Carl seemed to be enjoying it anyway. Lorenzo was so confused. But before he could look again he was whisked back home once more.

Now he was alone, but amidst the blinking of the Christmas lights he saw a strange shadow in the corner. He looked closer and realized it was the dark outline of a person. But he could not make out a face. The room was suddenly very cold. The shadow slowly moved forward.

“Are...are you the Ghost of Hot Dudes Yet To Come?” Lorenzo stammered.

The figure did not speak., not even to compliment his boxers. Lorenzo’s shirtless body was shaking in fear. The spirit pointed a bony finger into the darkness. Lorenzo felt a cold wind, looked around, and realized he was at a party. It was Carl’s annual Underwear & Cocoa Party. He saw two ripped dudes wearing only underwear, drinking cocoa, and chatting.

“I’m glad Lorenzo wasn’t invited. He always eats all the marshmallows,” said one of the ripped dudes.

“Not invited?” Lorenzo cried. “But I look so good in festive boxers! Spirit, I am not this marshmallow glutton! I can change!”

The spirit vanished and Lorenzo was once again alone. Early morning rays shined in his eyes. He reached for his phone but the battery was dead. He ran to the window and opened it and shouted at some random guy.

“What’s today, my fine fellow?”

“Today? Why, Christmas Day,” said the rando.

It wasn’t too late. Lorenzo threw on a coat over his boxers and bare, muscular chest, grabbed a bag of marshmallows, and ran outside. Today there would be marshmallows for all.

Yours in thirst,
Joanna (@robotics)

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