After all the bucking and squealing and screaming last night, Américo's feeling a little sore this A.M.
BuzzFeed Dude A Day
Ouch ouch ouch

Américo went bull riding last night. And it's a good thing he didn't go bareback like he'd originally wanted, because that only would've made his current situation infinitely more grim. As things now stand/slouch, Américo can barely move — his entire body throbs with pain. But he's still not entirely sure where everything went so wrong. One moment he was experiencing the purest pleasure of his life — clinging to the back of the mechanical bucking bull at Rhinestone Cowboy Cantina And Grill as all his closest friends cheered him on — and the next he found himself crumpled up nearly naked on the floor with no recollection of how he'd gotten there. Granted, that doesn't sound all that different from a typical Saturday night for Américo, but usually his ass doesn't hurt this much. Maybe it was the eighth round of tequila shots Margot ordered. Or when Axl told him to arch his back more (such a familiar request). Wait, actually, it was definitely when Kamdyn told him to see if he could go hands-free. Because god knows that's never actually worked before.

Yours in thirst,
Lincoln (@marytodd_)

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