Dude A Day: Wet And Messi

Hot dad-bod-on-a-boat alert, y'all! This is not a drill. Though we wouldn't mind him dril—

IMP / Coleman-Rayner

I've always been obsessed with soccer — or, rather, soccer players.

My dad desperately wanted a son to take with him to games so they could yell profanities at the players together. Instead, he had me and got to deal with comments like "OMG Cannavaro is literally the man of my dreams!" Because let's get real, soccer players have THE DREAMIEST BUTTS.

And, as an Argentine, I've always liked Messi. I mean, the man is talented beyond belief — he is the God of Soccer and there's no denying it. But it wasn't until recently when he went from boy-boy to ~Bad Boy~ that I found myself looking at more than just his moves. 👀 👀 👀

Yeah, I think you know what I mean...

And the good news: He just keeps getting better and better. Still, don't believe me? Let's do the math:

Tattoos + abs + summer tan = The One.

So if you're into sports, go check out his moves on the field. And if you're not, just, like, go and enjoy his spectacular pecs, OK? You deserve it.

Yours in thirst,
Conz (@conz)